I’ve spent the last few months working out in silence, my sweaty nature having destroyed my previous set of “waterproof” earpieces. I got a new set yesterday and today, for the first time in months, listened to my workout playlist, to which I have now added Sabaton, “Diggy Diggy Hole”, and a little bit of The Hu. Sabaton’s “The Ballad of Bull” and “Attack of the Dead Men” relate directly to two major, current projects of mine. That, however, is not the point of this introduction. The point is, for the first time in months, “Deception” by the Cruxshadows played over my headset while I worked out. My energy soared. I was suddenly twenty years younger and invincible, capable of anything.
I’ll explain why near the end.
Let me get back to “My First DragonCon”, the Sunday edition. Though I glossed over it in my excitement to get to this part, we had partied quite hard on Saturday and slept in a little on Sunday. When we finally dragged ourselves out of bed, we dressed and headed to another Hyatt breakfast. I think I might have confused Tammy’s outfits. I believe Saturday evening she had actually donned her incredibly skimpy, and somewhat see through, shiny metal mail top (a simple square of small metal scales) over tight black leather pants. Sunday morning, I believe, is when she put on the blue corset and purple fairy wings. I imagine you’re glad I sorted that out.
Moving on, after breakfast, we headed to check in on the Art Show. We witnessed someone purchase a print of Tammy’s “Inner Demon” painting. Tammy thanked her for her interest, the buyer replied that she loved the picture. I believe it is the only print of Tammy’s work anyone ever bought, perhaps outside family and friends (perhaps even including them, she usually gave prints away to such).
Afterward, we returned to the Exhibitor’s Hall. Other events may have occurred, but I only remember returning to Brute Force Leather, where the Red Leather Demon Hand Bikini awaited. As we approached, some other woman was trying it on and Tammy’s eyes narrowed. As they walked off, Tammy said to me, dripping with ire, “they just said they were going to get the money together to buy it”. She demanded to try it on next.
It fit perfectly.
After changing back out of it, she looked me in the eyes, innocent and big-eyed, and asked, “Do you love me?” <blink, blink…>
One guess what I said. It was the best $460 I have ever spent (mind you, I was a single, young Air Force officer with no kids or bills or anything- I was still in billeting at the time, not even paying rent).
She immediately dragged me back to our room… so she could change.
When we re-emerged from the Ivy Tower, I found that I was now the male escort/bodyguard for a celebrity. We never made it more than five feet before someone stopped us for another photo. Since then, I’ve attended DragonCon with popular costumes that garnered a good deal of attention. I have never experienced anything close to her popularity that night. With this newfound fame, she went to where they collected people for the Masquerade Costume Contest and attempted to get herself into it. Unfortunately, as I had guessed, it was far too late to sign up for it. Tammy gave a death glare to the poor woman who had to inform us this was the case.
Only slightly perturbed, we then got in line to get seats to watch the costume contest. This being my first experience with the contest, I was floored by the costumes. My memory is cloudy, even after looking at old pictures, but my favorites included a “Spy vs Spy” group, a gorgeous Major Kusanagi, and a brilliant Speed Racer, complete with a little carry around Mach One. As always, my apologies to all who I’m forgetting.
Afterward, we grabbed a quick food court dinner (my first experience with the <sniff> closed-on-Sunday Chik Fil-A) and then grabbed a drink at the Hyatt bar, and wandered out for a cigar on the smoke deck. Little did we know it at the time, but sharing that deck with us was an fairly new up and coming Baen author. This particular author had, apparently, begun to doubt whether he would continue to attend DragonCon. His doubts vanished when he witnessed a gorgeous brunette goddess stalk out onto that deck, cigar in hand, wearing a Red Leather Demon Hand Bikini. At the time, we were wholly unaware of anyone else on the deck.
That author was John Ringo. More on that at the end.
This brings us to My First Cruxshadows Concert, where we headed next.
Tammy owned “Music from the Succubus Club”, a collection created specifically for White Wolf’s “Vampire: The Masquerade” role playing game. Cruxshadows had created the song for the Ravnos, the vampire gypsies. I had otherwise been unacquainted with the band until now. Confusion reigned just before they took the stage when they were introduced by someone who gave a top ten list of why the Cruxshadows were awesome. Now, years past, I cannot recall all of them, but here are a few:
“That wonderful violin” (I already knew this to be true)
“A man with a pineapple on his head is screaming at you, and this is a good thing.” (Tammy explained they were playfully making fun of the lead singer’s hair)
“Those gorgeous dancers.” (My anticipation grew)
“The Cruxshadows fairies.” (Grew some more)
“Gee, wouldn’t it be awesome to be up there, dancing with the lead singer AND OH MY GOD I’M DANCING WITH THE LEAD SINGER!”
“You could swear every song starts off exactly the same, but you don’t care.”
I can confirm that, for years afterward, despite becoming a tremendous fan and listening to their music frequently, it took quite a long time to get to a point where I could discern the individual songs based on how they began. Some still confound me for a good thirty seconds or so.
Sometime into that first concert, I heard a familiar, piercing undulation of the violin. It was in that moment, as I recognized the opening chords of “Deception”, that I finally felt acceptance, a kinship with the strange mix of goths and ravers that filled the crowd. I’d had goth friends from high school, occasionally tried to meet up with them while at the academy, but had always remained an outsider. The dark, but seductive style had always entranced me. I was intoxicated by the blend of heavy industrial music and Victorian character . Try though I had, I had, perhaps ironically, never fit in. Tonight I did.
“She cries… children often do… when they’re cold, and hungry- too.”
It was my moment. I knew the words and sang along as if I had been a lifelong devotee. There I was, attired in a somewhat see through, highly non-characteristic metallic weave shirt, dancing alongside a true to life succubus, Dawn herself, a brunette beauty clad in, well… you know what. A mere few feet from the stage, awe got the full effect of the “man with a pineapple on his head” screaming at us full tilt. The man was, still is, Rogue, the lead singer and driving force of the Cruxshadows. The pineapple was, and still is, his spiky thick black hairstyle, his trademark.
“Come closer… see the darkness in her eyes, so delicate… quite unlike her smile.”
Belting out the words, bouncing like a marionette, glancing over at the evil sorceress who had bewitched me, it seemed life could not possibly get better than this. This was the holy grail, the moment of transcendence, the pinnacle of my life. I was falling in to the warm arms of an abyss of bliss. Dreamily I returned my gaze to the stage. Rogue had dropped back down into the crowd, as he was known to do. The foreshadowed gorgeous dancers, one of which was his girlfriend (his wife at some point, I don’t think she was yet) were a sight to behold as well, all a part of the glamorous dream I was living. They were flexible and energetic, yet despite their best efforts they were unable to tempt my lust away from the beauty next to me.
“Pray for day-y-light, pray for mor-r-ning, pray for an end to… our deception!”
Someone grabbed me from behind. Whipping my head back to see what was happening I found myself to staring into the face of the gorgeous, gaunt, pineapple headed vocalist. Frantically, I attempted to move aside, out of his way so that he could continue through the crowd. His grip on my elbow tightened and I froze, confounded, embarrassed, unsure of what he wanted. As this transgressed, stuck in time, I perceived another familiar piece of the music. The violin solo started, and Rogue pulled me around into a jig. Holy Hell! OH MY GOD I’M DANCING WITH THE LEAD SINGER!!!!!
I was a god in that moment.
I bounced around like an idiot, making horns with my free hand and sticking my tongue out as if I was Gene Simmons. He switched our direction halfway through. When it was over, Tammy and I glared at each other, shouting with our eyes. That just happened!
As I said, this song is now in my workout mix. I fear that someday I will push myself too hard when the song comes on. It was one of the greatest memories from one of the most intense periods of my life.
It was all somewhat of a blur after that. I do remember that Tammy and I were subsequently among the five people to wind up on stage with them for “Marilyn, my Bitterness”- they had not yet started pulling up everyone who would fit up on stage with them. Likely for the better, since the little stage they had in the Regency II-III ballroom that year might not have taken the weight.
Afterward, we wandered into the ongoing concert of Jefferson Starship. Again, Tammy was quickly one of three women chosen to climb up on stage with the band. When they broke into “Somebody to Love”, I got to watch as Tammy wedged herself into the corner of the keyboardist’s setup. She had a wicked, devilish grin as she forced him to play around her, as if saying “don’t mess up, don’t meeesss uuppp!”
So.
Those are the highlights. The next morning we rushed to pack up all of our stuff, pack up her art, and race back to the airport. We promptly passed out on the airplane on the way back to Albuquerque, back to continue our training in the same schoolhouse in which I currently work.
It was the only DragonCon I would ever attend with her.
On March 23, 2003, while both of us were deployed in and around Afghanistan for Operation Enduring Freedom, she was the copilot on an HH-60 Pave Hawk rescue helicopter on a mission to pick up two injured Afghani children. While refueling off a HC-130P Combat King, the aircraft I flew (I was not on that specific aircraft that night), they experienced rotor blade stall and crashed into a ridge. I had the honor of escorting the crew’s remains back to the U.S.
Two years later, DragonCon 2004, I attended with the woman who is now my wonderful wife, and also with Tammy’s best friend, Kacey. Kacey, if you’ll remember, was the one who convinced Tammy to go to her first DragonCon in 2001, and is thus the reason Tammy took me. We found ourselves on the Hyatt cigar deck one night, where Kacey struck up a conversation (as she does), with another gentleman who was out there smoking his own cigar.
He explained to her that he had been on that deck two years prior, wondering whether he should continue attending DragonCon, when he had witnessed…
Kacey explained that was her friend Tammy.
John Ringo has dedicated his books to Tammy ever since.
That, my friends, is the story of My First DragonCon.
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